Day 1 continued...(mostly writing this down 3 weeks later before the memory becomes even foggier than it already is)
The bad news it is leukemia." I said, "What?" The doctor looks right at Wil and says I'm sorry, you have cancer. I literally want to punch her, but have no time to react as Wil immediately starts crying out and looking at me "what did I do? what did I do?"...#mommabear immediately kicks in and I jump on the table next to him reassuring him that it was nothing he did. Big tears fall down his face and I can do nothing but reassure him that this is ok, that #wegotthis...the doctor chimes in and says something positive, not really sure (because I'm still pretty pissed at her for the diagnosis-like it was her fault, ugh). I really think time stood still for a bit because the doctor was talking non-stop so many many words, just words and I couldn't hear or understand any of them. I kinda hope my sisters have saved our text messages, because I remember being very angry (much like a #mommabear whose cub has been attacked). She said like, "things are going to move very fast from here on out," and I'm like what? A nurse comes in and asks Wil if he wants some numbing cream on his arm before he gets his IV and I'm like "STOP what are you talking about?". I really was under the delusion that they were going to give us some medicine and send us home. I get the gist that they are going to take Wil to the hospital and that this is serious by all the people going in and out of our room. I ask is he going to be in the hospital? She says yes, probably for a very long time. I text my sisters "I need you here now" and then remember thinking, how do I tell Chris? I'm sure he has the text message, but it went something like it is leukemia, come here NOW (I had been texting him and my sisters non-stop before about how pissed I was that this doctor said she was testing for leukemia, like WHY would you say that when you didn't even have any blood work? Looking back and now knowing everything I know about ALL, it was pretty easy to see from the bleeding and the bruising and the sores in his mouth that he had leukemia, but wow it was like someone hit me over the head with a shovel). Chris says he was in the middle of a conference call and he just hung up, threw down his headset and drove to the clinic. I text Kate to come to me, I sent her my location, she knew Wil was getting blood work at the doctors and she asked, "what is it?" and I couldn't answer her. I called Kristen and she was hours away headed to her boyfriend's college graduation party in his hometown. I don't even remember how that conversation went except that I said come here now. The nurse asked me at some point during this, "is there someone we can call for you?" I'm pretty sure I had that lost soul look on my face and I said, "I called my husband, he's on his way." I'm not really good on social clues but I could tell by her look that that wasn't what she meant...I picked up the phone and called my best friend, Brandi at school. She picked up the phone, I'm not sure what I said, but she said, "I'm on my way."
It wasn't too long after all this was going on that Wil asked me if he could put this on snapchat. I remember thinking NO! But after an hour or so, I remember thinking well...my family knows and the rest of the family isn't on snapchat. I figured if I didn't even know how to tell my own kids or my best friend, that I might as well let Wil communicate his news in his generations manner. I'm pretty sure that his cancer has been well documented on his social media snapchat...I just wish that it was not a one and done picture site because I would like to have had his perspective. Except for that very first 2 minutes of shock, he immediately went into normal Wil mode, joking and making everyone else laugh.
The rest of the story will definately be told in bits and pieces...
Kate showing up at the cancer center
teasing the nurse about being shot
meeting Kristen in the lobby of the hospital
the girls walking him to his room in the pediatric intensive care unit
signing the paperwork
Wil having his first surgery
Wil having his Blood cleaned (Plasmapheresis) because his white blood cell counts were 408,000 (normal about 5,000)
His bad reaction to the drugs (scary and funny at the same time)
My family there in force...pizza and all.
The bad news it is leukemia." I said, "What?" The doctor looks right at Wil and says I'm sorry, you have cancer. I literally want to punch her, but have no time to react as Wil immediately starts crying out and looking at me "what did I do? what did I do?"...#mommabear immediately kicks in and I jump on the table next to him reassuring him that it was nothing he did. Big tears fall down his face and I can do nothing but reassure him that this is ok, that #wegotthis...the doctor chimes in and says something positive, not really sure (because I'm still pretty pissed at her for the diagnosis-like it was her fault, ugh). I really think time stood still for a bit because the doctor was talking non-stop so many many words, just words and I couldn't hear or understand any of them. I kinda hope my sisters have saved our text messages, because I remember being very angry (much like a #mommabear whose cub has been attacked). She said like, "things are going to move very fast from here on out," and I'm like what? A nurse comes in and asks Wil if he wants some numbing cream on his arm before he gets his IV and I'm like "STOP what are you talking about?". I really was under the delusion that they were going to give us some medicine and send us home. I get the gist that they are going to take Wil to the hospital and that this is serious by all the people going in and out of our room. I ask is he going to be in the hospital? She says yes, probably for a very long time. I text my sisters "I need you here now" and then remember thinking, how do I tell Chris? I'm sure he has the text message, but it went something like it is leukemia, come here NOW (I had been texting him and my sisters non-stop before about how pissed I was that this doctor said she was testing for leukemia, like WHY would you say that when you didn't even have any blood work? Looking back and now knowing everything I know about ALL, it was pretty easy to see from the bleeding and the bruising and the sores in his mouth that he had leukemia, but wow it was like someone hit me over the head with a shovel). Chris says he was in the middle of a conference call and he just hung up, threw down his headset and drove to the clinic. I text Kate to come to me, I sent her my location, she knew Wil was getting blood work at the doctors and she asked, "what is it?" and I couldn't answer her. I called Kristen and she was hours away headed to her boyfriend's college graduation party in his hometown. I don't even remember how that conversation went except that I said come here now. The nurse asked me at some point during this, "is there someone we can call for you?" I'm pretty sure I had that lost soul look on my face and I said, "I called my husband, he's on his way." I'm not really good on social clues but I could tell by her look that that wasn't what she meant...I picked up the phone and called my best friend, Brandi at school. She picked up the phone, I'm not sure what I said, but she said, "I'm on my way."
It wasn't too long after all this was going on that Wil asked me if he could put this on snapchat. I remember thinking NO! But after an hour or so, I remember thinking well...my family knows and the rest of the family isn't on snapchat. I figured if I didn't even know how to tell my own kids or my best friend, that I might as well let Wil communicate his news in his generations manner. I'm pretty sure that his cancer has been well documented on his social media snapchat...I just wish that it was not a one and done picture site because I would like to have had his perspective. Except for that very first 2 minutes of shock, he immediately went into normal Wil mode, joking and making everyone else laugh.
The rest of the story will definately be told in bits and pieces...
Kate showing up at the cancer center
teasing the nurse about being shot
meeting Kristen in the lobby of the hospital
the girls walking him to his room in the pediatric intensive care unit
signing the paperwork
Wil having his first surgery
Wil having his Blood cleaned (Plasmapheresis) because his white blood cell counts were 408,000 (normal about 5,000)
His bad reaction to the drugs (scary and funny at the same time)
My family there in force...pizza and all.
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